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I think a lot of the reason Iapos;m having trouble making friends is that I had become so used to seeing friends on a daily basis. At NYSP, we lived together. At Smith, they were always near by and you could bump into anybody even if you didnapos;t regularly have class together.
I donapos;t do well with hunting down friends Iapos;ll only see every-now-and-then. Iapos;m okay with friendships that start when we see each other regularly and continue into when we arenapos;t so close, but I canapos;t get myself to hunt for people. Make plans with strangers. Augh.

And Iapos;m figuring out why Iapos;m so dissatisfied with my regular-3 friends options. I think that the longer youapos;re in Korea, the more you lose some of the subtlety of English conversation, or maybe the pleasantries. If I came up to a fellow teacher in America and said, "I think Liam is really maturing" and they didnapos;t necessarily agree, would they not say, "Really? I havenapos;t noticed. What makes you say that?" instead of "Or youapos;re just becoming a better teacher." Back-handed compliments aside, if you donapos;t understand or agree with what someone has just said, donapos;t you usually ask for more information before offering a totally different idea?
A is really unkind, says these sorts of things regularly. B is sometimes kind, sometimes unkind, but always believes that I should just get over things and, no matter how Iapos;m handling them, itapos;s the wrong way. C came to work drunk today-apos;nough said.
In general, theyapos;re really good at just hurting my feelings and I wouldnapos;t say Iapos;m an overly sensitive person. I am used to finding my co-workers in many other jobs offensive, but never do I think Iapos;ve worked with people so callous. The idea of going back to work in twenty minutes after this break is over makes me want to vomit. And I told myself I would prep right through my whole break, not go home at all. But I was just too upset. Being offended is one thing, I can get angry or attribute behavior to ignorance, but when my feelings are hurt, I just shut down.

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